In an earlier post, I had mentioned how single mothers are similar to all other mothers but yet VERY different. One of those differences is the single mother has to be both mom and dad. Even in a co-parenting situation. Single mothers are pretty much on their own for getting the job done on a day-to-day. Sometimes trying to be everything, to everyone, in every situation, can be a bit tiring.
I had one of those weeks where the to-do list kept growing and items on it, refused to come off. I couldn’t get callbacks or email replies from places I was inquiring about booking my daughter’s birthday party. A mistake at work caused a project to go much longer than planned for and now my workload has doubled. I had four home/remodeling projects I have been juggle at the same time for months. The mailman misplaced a package I ordered that was clothes for my daughter and he refuses to call me back. And the list goes on and on and on!
Life doesn’t stop because the to-do list is growing. We still have homework, soccer, bible class, small group, and a job. Some days I feel like a pressure cooker that is getting ready to explode. If it was acceptable, I would stand in the middle of the street, screaming at the top of my lungs. Don’t worry, I know this isn’t the behavior I could get away with. Just the very thought of doing it, however, is very therapeutic.
The image of me screaming in the street is what made me realize how important it is to have an outlet. I mean a real, true way to bring life’s pressures into perspective. Due to our unique circumstance, the weight we were never meant to bear can seem like an overload. In order to be the mother our children need, we have to learn how to regain life’s balance.
What’s your outlet? Think about it, I mean really think about it. How do you bring yourself back to calm? If you can’t find the answer, please go searching for it. I mean it. Go look now!
It hit me hard when my daughter told me that I needed a vacation. One without her. It was in this moment I begin to ponder how she might perceive me. Does she see me as this stressed out, angry, and frustrated monster? Or can see a mother who is gracefully wearing the many hats life requires her to wear? I want her to see the latter; because there isn’t one day of her life I want her to believe or feel I need a vacation without her. She doesn’t make my life harder, she makes it brighter. Thank you Niomi!
What message are you sending your little one(s)?
Sincerely,
Nona A. Phinn
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